Mumbai

"Whump", we "touched down" in Mumbai. The only person who will be pleased about my experience is my dentist. I can almost hear him explaining the intricacies of the reconstructive work he will need to perform.

"Welcome to Mumbai," the heavily accented voice announced. Time to alight the plane, thank god! 

A rickety staircase was propped up against the plane, leading me down to the searing tarmac to a waiting bus. I boarded the bus. Plumes of acrid black smoke billowed from the rear as the driver gunned the ancient chariot towards the rather aptly named Terminal Building.

I made my way to passport control, where the stony-faced occupant of a claustrophobic booth, stamped my passport in the appropriate places. He paused briefly to compare the photograph with its weary counterpart.

Any similarity between where the signs indicate, and the actual location of the baggage retrieval carousel is purely coincidental. I wandered around aimlessly, finally locating the matching flight number to the carousel by luck more than judgment. Jerking to life, the carousel brought the baggage from the plane. I waited anxiously while more and more people collected their luggage. Some had even circled several times, beckoning their owners.

Trying to explain that my luggage was missing, to a disinterested airport employee concerned only with returning to a rudely interrupted slumber filled me with dread.

My spirits lifted when I spotted the Paklite as it snaked along the conveyor, emerging finally from the bowels of the baggage retrieval system. At last, I will be able to clear customs.

I placed my baggage on the x-ray machine and watched it disappear behind the black rubber fingers. The machine clicked loudly and then thrummed, revealing the entire skeletal system of one of my fellow travellers. I thought it just as well that I had no plans for more children.

The last bastion cleared, and I was free! The Pope's ritual kissing of the tarmac upon disembarking didn't seem so strange now.

© 2004 Gavan Jacobs

Thanks to Pilot Go from Pixabay for sharing the Air India image.

I went to India on a work assignment, and on the way back, I wrote this observational piece about my experience on Air India. There may be some dated references in it, but I think it has stood the test of time fairly well (as have I, despite the flight!).